You know, as I've moved from youth's naivete, I still get drawn towards recklessness. Impulsive isn't quite a good descriptor. A person once told me I have a "glitch" in my flight/fight response. Example--I have a fear of open-air heights. So I can be on the top floor of a skyscraper, as long as I'm enclosed. But put me on top of a mountain, and I just might not make it. The "normal" response would be to move away from that which invokes fear, right? Well, oddly, I get a sick compulsion to move towards it. On a high cliff, a battle ensues between rationality and recklessness. So I just don't go there.
Fear is rarely a motivator. Pain, perhaps? Purpose, most definitely. For this, I'm glad to get older. I hope I get wiser. I wish I loved better. Idealistic? Yes. My family and friends are awesome. Their hearts are large. They choose to love even if you haven't showered for days, your dirty laundry is all over town, and you are just a pain in the ass. Everyone else, mostly passing pleasures; hopefully, a few, I can one day call, "friends."
